


Aftermath

by Voidfish



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 09:29:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11871447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Voidfish/pseuds/Voidfish
Summary: Lucretia, when creating the Bureau of Balance, prepared herself for a hundred different possibilities, each more horrible than the last. If, in order to heal the wounds that they had made, she needed to play dirty, she would. If someone had to be the necessary evil, Lucretia was glad that it could be her and not someone that she cared for.She never wanted Davenport to get caught in the crossfire, though.





	Aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings in this fic for Lucretia having a panic attack (very mild but still) in section 3 and Davenport having a panic attack in section 12. There's a kidnapping in there, too, and angst, but everyone ends up ok!
> 
> Listen I'm prepared to fill up the Davenport tag myself.
> 
> This is my last fic before I head off to college!!! I'll still be writing but less.

At first, there is no Bureau of Balance. At first there is just one woman atoning for sins her family committed and a man locked inside his own mind.

***

He isn’t allowed to come with her as she searches for the relics, at first. 

“It’s too dangerous”, she tells him, shaking hands gripping at his shoulders, kneeling to be at eye level. “I’ll be right back, and everything will be alright, okay?”

“Davenport,” is the cheerful reply.

***

She doesn’t know what he can understand and what he can’t. She wonders what happens in that brain of his, if it’s all static and screaming or if it’s just that heavy silence that drowns all other thought.

There are good days, days where he speaks to her, soothing nothings that help to undo the tension in her stomach. There are days where he understands, where he reads the room with the keen eyes of a captain and he responds. He brings her tissues before the tears even spill, clutching her hands and orchestrating her breathing seconds before the first sob breaks out.

And then there are days where it takes him minutes, in his disarray, to realize that she has slipped out of the room to the bathroom, that there’s the outline of tears on her desk, that if he could think than he would have acted. Those are the days he returns, fifteen minutes after the tremors start, with a plate of tea and an apology written over his face that he just can’t verbalize. He doesn’t dare try to talk, because the only word that could possibly slip off of his tongue would just cause her to shake harder. He places the tea down and leaves, whispering his name.

Lucretia doesn’t know which is worse, the days where she remembers how much she took away from her captain or the days where she can almost see the outline of her friend in the shadow of this man.

***

Lucretia, when creating the Bureau of Balance, prepared herself for a hundred different possibilities, each more horrible than the last. She knew how the relics worked, what her friends had done to the world, and she had understood that there was a possibility that the people that she was recruiting to help capture the relics might fall under their control. And, as much as it disappointed her, she was prepared for betrayal, prepared for death, to find more pawns for the sick game that they were playing. If, in order to heal the wounds that they had made, she needed to play dirty, she would. If someone had to be the necessary evil, Lucretia was glad that it could be her and not someone that she cared for.

She never wanted Davenport to get caught in the crossfire, though.

***

The first time that someone betrays the Bureau of Balance haunts Lucretia when she sleeps. She couldn’t have seen it coming, there’s no way she could have known, but it still steals the air from her lungs as she remembers how close things almost were, and in those moments she visits Davenport, reminds herself that he’s okay.

***

The members of the Bureau would whisper to themselves, spreading gossip and theories on the gnome that trailed after Madame Director.

He couldn’t be a bodyguard. Perhaps he was a sorcerer? He had to be some sort of protection.

One of the members asked Lucretia, a burly man named Flint that made her think of Magnus in his strength and recklessness.

“Oh, he’s just a friend,” was the Director’s response, still young and naive, still thinking that if she had lost her family she could make a substitute until she could recover them.

That was her first mistake.

***

It was almost too easy to get to the Director, if you were cruel. She was a powerful woman, well-protected and well hidden, but she had a weak spot that could be easily exploited.

Davenport.

***

Lucretia wakes up one morning and Davenport isn’t there. Panic sets into her bones, a deep and steady ache as she checks his corridors, and then her corridors, and then his again because something is very wrong.

A part of her wonders if he had remembered, suddenly, and ran. It was impossible...right? 

To be truthful, they knew nothing about Fisher and how these things worked. There could be a day when the memories were returned.  
Then there was the fear that, in his daze, Davenport had wandered off somewhere, maybe even somewhere planetside. Lucretia tried to dismiss this thought, too, but honestly who knew what was going on at this point except that every nerve in her body was screaming and something was very, very wrong.

There’s a note waiting for her, lying on her desk when she finally retires to it.

Meet me at the following address in Neverwinter. Alone. Or the gnome gets it.

***

As she shoots off towards Neverwinter images flicker through her mind, unwanted pictures of Davenport, unconscious and dying. Davenport was one of the crew members to die the least, but they all had close calls and tough years. He was strong and powerful, not a fighter by nature but a fearless enemy nonetheless. He still got hurt, back then, back when he could think and talk and consistently function. These memories are like a bad reminder of the century Lucretia was trying to forget. Except Lucretia understands, this time, that they’ve used up all their resets this time. Any damage is permanent, and Davenport didn’t deserve that. He had sustained enough damage from her, already.

***

When she arrives at the destination it’s dark outside and Lucretia’s heart is pounding too loudly, but she refuses to lose her family. Not while she can do something about it.

***

Davenport is writhing in the arms of Flint, who grins at Lucretia’s approach.

“Madame Director,” Flint begins, “I think we both have something the other wants.”

And one look in Flint’s eyes confirms Lucretia’s fear-he’s under the thrall of some relic. Probably, she chastises herself, the thrall of her staff, which she hadn’t been strict enough about lately. This all could have been avoided. 

Davenport mutters to himself, and Flint clamps his hand across Davenport’s mouth.

She can’t tell, in the moment, how lucid the gnome is, but she knows the day before was bad, and as she feels herself shake she doubts that he’s all there.

“Let him go,” Lucretia starts, trying to keep her voice even, “and we can discuss this.”  
Flint laughs. “How stupid do you think-”

Before he finishes the sentence he lets out a scream, and flings his hand out. Davenport, who managed to bite the hand, falls onto the floor, scrambling towards Lucretia. Flint scoops him up by his ankles second before he could reach her and grabs Davenport by his throat.

“Not so fast,” Flint snarls. 

Lucretia casts a sleep spell, and Flint reluctantly falls, arm still wrapped around Davenport.

“I’m sorry,” Lucretia mutters as she takes the pressure off of Davenport’s throat, finger by finger. “I am so, so sorry.”

Davenport smiles weakly up at her, hand resting on her hand. “‘S o-k-kay,” he rasps out, concentrating on each word. 

He was like this on the Starblaster, too, bleeding out over Merle yet making sure the medic himself was ok, reassuring the team as tragedy fell. Lucretia always admired that quality.

“Let’s get you home,” Lucretia says, helping Davenport up. He’s weak, shock finally setting in, but he refuses to be carried, although he does take Lucretia’s outstretched hand.

“I’ll be right back,” Lucretia promises as Davenport leaves the room before she turns and deals with the unconscious man on the floor.

***

She returns from tying up Flint to find Davenport shaking, hands clenched together, eyes shut.

“Dav?” She asks softly, and the man gasps, eyes squeezing tighter. “What’s wrong?” She reaches out, hands hovering in front of her friend. He looks her in the eyes and nods, so Lucretia embraces him, rubbing circles in his back and whispering reassurances in his ear. 

“I’m sorry, I won’t let this happen again,” she promises.

“Why a-am I a-angry,” Davenport stutters out, and Lucretia’s heart breaks.

***

The crew had told her about the judges, about the sins each member apparently possessed. Davenport, when they got to him, simply shrugged, heat rising to his face. “I think, in the position we’re in,” he said, and Lucretia immediately chronicled, “we have every right to be, to be angry. The problem is, it’s what we do with that anger if-when we’re done.”  
***

She hopes that the return of Merle, Magnus, and Taako will have a positive effect on Davenport, will help him to find some part of himself that was misplaced, but if anything it makes the bad days more frequent until all he says is his name. 

***

He’s back, and he’s angry, but all that matters to Lucretia is that her friend, her dear friend, is back.

***

They talk, after the end of the world. He invites her to have tea in the cafeteria of the Bureau of Balance, which is only slightly destroyed and is fairly empty.

Lucretia is expecting poison from his tongue, she is prepared to lose her friend because she knows that’s what she deserves because she broke him for a plan that didn’t even work-

“Lu-Lucretia?” Davenport asks, voice tense. “Are you alright?”

Lucretia plasters a smile on. “I’m fine. I-I really should be asking you that question, shouldn’t I?”

Davenport chuckles a little. “I’m-well, r-reasonably I’m a little mad.”

Lucretia nods. “Reasonably so, yes.”

“But,” Davenport says, “I think we’re gonna be okay.”

Lucretia blinks, stunned. “Why? I’m glad, but honestly, I don’t know if I deserve your forgiveness.”

Davenport shook his head. “You made a mistake, Lucretia. A really big m-mistake,” he grabbed her hands, “but you did it for what you thought w-was a good reason.”

“Alright,” Lucretia nods, brain fuzzy, forgiveness a foreign topic.

“And,” Davenport adds, “w-we’re family.”

***

In the end, there is no more Bureau of Balance. There’s a woman with a mission of peace and, thousands of miles away, a man in the ocean.

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is @infernaltwink, come cry about Davenport with me!


End file.
